The first piece by Martha Marinara talks about fluid identity in the classroom. In the text she refers to it as being “in between two norms”.

This was another interesting read. I think the topic of fluidity in general in a classroom setting has always been weird to me. Simply because I never seen an instant where that could possibly matter. As a teacher there is not any type of activity I conduct that would have to make my students feel in any way that they are being discriminated against or even made to feel like they HAVE have to identify with anything. It doesn’t matter to me as long as you feel safe and welcomed in my room no matter who you are. It is hard for me to wrap my head around this not being the case for other educators. I noticed at my school they had a workshop on this topic and how to make students feel comfortable. I think thats step in the right directions but based on the teachers reactions no one really took it serious and that makes me a little worried.

I’m satisfied as to where I am in the process with my project.  I’m almost done. I just have a little bit of tidying up to do with some poems. I decided to rewrite some of them while adding to others. I also added five more poems from the chap book and one I just wrote this week, to the electronic literature piece. I did that because I chose not to add music, I wanted to add more poems and photographs.

The greatest victory of this semester was figuring out a way to add photographs to Twine. It became the bane of my existence for weeks. I actually did a happy dance when I figured it out. I would like to thank YouTube for guiding me. The issue was that I didn’t have the right program to convert the photographs to an HTML code. Which is needed in order to upload photos to Twine. Once I did that, I was able to really finalize my piece. Since, I had the time, I decided to add more poems. Three out of the four sections have four poems and one section had three poems. I think fifteen poems is a great amount for the time allotted for the construction of this piece. 

I really enjoyed playing around with the Twine website. I liked that I got to take my chapbook to the next level. The photographs with the poems added depth and dimension to my written work. I’m excited to share what I made with the class. 

I am at the point where I’m ready to close out my E-Lit piece, Ive just been having trouble figuring out if I have enough information or if I should I add more. Ive been using Inklewriter and it is super easy to work and navigate through which I’m happy about. I’m looking forward to getting feedback from the class to ensure if I’m going in the right direction.

My final project is a work in progress, and really, it will be until I decide it’s done. I want this to be at least a few months long. It’s posted on Reddit where anyone can find and read it. Since it is posted on Reddit, the posts can be read in any order.

One thing I’ve found out however is that for pictures, I have to post them with the text instead of linking to them. Though so far, I am enjoying this. There will be a post going live during class.

So I think my final project might be actually done. I feel content with it; part of me wants to add more but also another part of me likes it the way it is. But I’m also a libra so I’m always very indecisive. I think now what’s left for me to do is the final project assessment and make sure that is completed for my portfolio submission with all my links.

I am excited to share and discuss in class tomorrow about my final project and share my collective and private work with everyone

xx Jules

I think I already mentioned that laminin is going to be difficult to finish before it’s due. That said, I think most of it should make enough sense and enough of a point to say that it’s finished enough. I’m not planning to rush to finish this though, so I’ll continue working on it probably for some time after this even.

I think the only major hiccup I have for that is publishing my piece from Twine so it has a live link. I tried using the link my browser gives me when I click “test from here,” but if I open it on any other browser or device, it doesn’t work. It will simply lead users to create something on Twine themselves. I’ll probably figure this out by asking one of my swimmers after practice tonight, but if anyone has suggestions on how to do that, I’d really appreciate it.

Other than that, there are still so many testimonies that I’m prepared to add to this, and so much more from the Bible to add too (as that really is meant to be the center of the piece anyway). And I know there may be people that read those Bible passages and might not get it, or maybe some will roll their eyes because they’ve been hurt by Christians. I get that. I used to do the same thing, and I know a few people in my life right now that continue to do that too. But here’s the thing– it bothered me when I first heard this quote, and it bothers me now even more that I do believe:

I’ve always said that I don’t respect people who don’t proselytize. I don’t respect that at all. If you believe that there’s a heaven and a hell, and people could be going to hell or not getting eternal life, and you think that it’s not really worth telling them this because it would make it socially awkward—and atheists who think people shouldn’t proselytize and who say just leave me along and keep your religion to yourself—how much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize? How much do you have to hate somebody to believe everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?

“I mean, if I believed, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that a truck was coming at you, and you didn’t believe that truck was bearing down on you, there is a certain point where I tackle you. And this is more important than that.

Penn Jillette (from Penn & Teller)

While I have no intention of shoving my beliefs down someone’s throat (which is how most people get hurt by the Church), I wouldn’t be loving people if I didn’t at least tell them about the God I know to be real, true, loving, just, merciful, faithful, and kind, among many other things. Is it awkward sometimes? Yes. But in a world where everything is broken in its own way, having the One thing that keeps us whole is going to be uncomfortable, it’s going to make you stand out, and it’s going to hurt sometimes. But He still holds us together. I mean that’s the whole point behind this piece and that’s why I’m in no rush to get it 100% finished (and just to finish it well enough to hand in).

That’s also why I named this piece laminin. I wouldn’t doubt there have been times in other people’s lives, as there have been in mine, where it felt like God was allowing everything to fall apart. And maybe on the surface He was– though He doesn’t cause things to fall apart (that’s just what the broken nature of this world does), He allows it for a bigger purpose than we often might see. But deep down, He was still holding us together through those times. How?

Laminin is a glycoprotein that essentially holds the cells of our bodies together. Is it a coincidence that it’s in the shape of a cross? Is it a coincidence that the cross, as Rome had ‘perfected’ it until Constantine I abolished its use, used to be a symbol of the most excruciating, humiliating, shameful, and gruesome deaths that one could experience? Is it a coincidence that this symbol now also represents new life to how many millions of people around the world, that it’s a symbol of life so strong that many of those people are continuously being persecuted to the point of death?

And I want to bring that back to the point I made with that quote from Penn Jillette for just a moment. It’s not as common (though also not completely unheard of) in America that Christians are persecuted to such a point. While I’ve seen and heard such threats, Pastor Russell Johnson at the Pursuit NW being one of them, I’m also hearing much more from even people within my own church that are afraid to make things awkward or to lose friends due to sharing their faith. But first off, are they really your friend if they don’t hear you out and still love you as a human being, even if your beliefs are a bit different? Also, were you really their friend if you don’t love them enough to care about their eternity? And finally, if God isn’t enough for you, then what is? God is the one and only thing that will never fail or break or forsake you, so if He isn’t enough… what is?

And that’s the other point I’m starting to build on within this piece– Christians should be bold. There is no greater love we can give than to lovingly share the Gospel and spread the good news of God. I’m hoping this will be an encouragement to people in the faith that are scared to be bold because I get it. My social anxiety has been crippling at times. My trauma and certain triggers have forced me out of otherwise fun things or things where God was moving. But God. Do I still feel the anxiety or get bothered by certain triggers and stuff? Yes. That doesn’t usually just disappear. God can, but I’ve found that my anxiety has been that thorn in my side, as Paul wrote somewhere in the New Testament, that reminds me to rely on Him when I need it most. And when I do rely on Him more, it gets easier to move through, even if the circumstances don’t necessarily change. I don’t have to retreat from social or triggering situations because there’s no safer place than where God calls you to be. And I’m hoping that laminin will be that encouragement to Christians too.

The semester is drawing to a close and we only have one E-lit class left! I’m happy to say that I’ve finished my final project: all the pieces are written and all the QR codes have been made and printed. Now, my one concern is that we’re in for rain tomorrow when I was supposed to do a (literal) walkthrough of my project. Because of its nature as a piece of locative fiction, it really won’t give the same effect when not presented “on location,” but, well, we can’t control the weather, so I suppose there’s not really anything that can be done! Still, I’m holding out hope that by the time our class begins, the rain will have stopped…

All I have left to do before the completion of class is my self-assessment narrative. I hope everyone’s semester is ending well. Just hold out, the finish line is within sight! And Happy Holidays to all who are celebrating something in the weeks to come

I have started the recording process for my progress, which I have changed to more of a photoshoot than anything else, though they are live photos so we will see what I can do in regards to transferring those to my digital map. Some challenges have come forth, the most notable being that a bunch of twenty-year olds reenacting fight scenes outside of elementary, middle, and high schools during school hours (sunlight is limited this time of year) is a bit risky and inappropriate – so the weekend it is. We have needed to reschedule some “scenes.”

Besides that the updates are not monumentous, there are two main components to this project, and I am confident that I will get it done well and on time.

I started with Hana Feels, which felt similar to a a job training session, but it felt more personal because of the content. Also, we had a glance into Hana’s journal and that added a whole other layer to it all. The first thing that came to mind when I finished the piece was all about consequences. Mostly, it reminded me how a seemingly good intentioned statement may be perceived the complete opposite way by the other person. It’s a lot of responsibility when your in Will’s shoes because anything you say can have a tragic ending. All of his statements are very neutral for the most part which makes it difficult to decipher what the “right answer” is. I guess that’s also why this piece had a little more pressure involved. Most of the previous E-Lit pieces we’ve touched upon have been about our own reading journey and there hasn’t really been too much a right or wrong answer when navigating, besides Everything is Going To Be OK, which is interesting considering the similarity in content.

Speaking of consequences, Upgrade Soul had to do more with being humna and…. not. We are introduced to an old couple seeking to outlive life through untested scientific procedures. Of course, it doesn’t go right for them. What interested me was the fact that they volunteered themselves as guinea pigs simply because they had the money to do it. They weren’t worried about that aspect, but they were more concerned with the idea that they’d be known for being the first to endure the experiment. Without thinking about their physical selves, they gave their bodies to science in exchange for social praise. It reminds me of the whole idea of throwing untrained billionaires up to space because they can, and they want to show that they can because of their social standing.

As for my E-Lit project, frustrations are at their peak honestly. Not with the workload, or the writing aspect, but the creation of it. There are so many ideas and so little time, I have to be okay with not being able to accomplish exactly what I have in mind. I have decided to use Canva since it’s familiar and allows me to attach links to photos. The biggest question is the theme my photos will share and what specific message I want to tell my audience. I have been thinking about nostalgia as a theme because it is what brought me to these photos. Then again, looking through these photos has allowed me to reflect on myself and my growth. I think the latter might be a better shared theme since it’s a bit more narrow. The navigation of it all is still shaky. But, I think it’s close to clicking together… I just have to see it slowly coming together on the screen.